45. Gary Mula

45. Gary Mula. When I first joined 66 Saints in, I think 1993, they practiced down on first and spokane at a place called the Dutchman. The Dutchman was so cool, it seemed like every major band out of Seattle had spent time there - Tad, Nirvana, Mudhoney and the Screaming Trees - just to name a few of the biggies, we also practiced next to The Gits and had many other friends in the building, it was a deep dive for me into the Seattle music scene, and a big step from jamming in the basement with friends to having a real practice space, where music was happening around me all the time.Our first room at the Dutchman was upstairs in the corner. It was hotter than hell, and we had to lug our equipment up and down those stairs for every gig, but I loved all of it. It was in that first room that I made it through my first rehearsal with Lisa and Kat, my first real baptism into moving gear. Later we moved to a bigger downstairs room that we shared with Miracle Baby, Fiia McGann, Sanjaya Krishna and John Sullivan. From that room we could hear Joan Jett playing with the Gits as Evil Stig, and from that room, I also started to know Gary a little bit more, since we now practiced on the floor that he lived on, just steps away from his door.I don't have a lot of memories of Gary from that time, Lisa was the one who did all the business part of the band, so she paid rent and had the relationship with Gary, but I would see him around, and of course, he would come into our room from time to time to fix a leaking ceiling or switch out a light. I don't know how much recording he was doing then, because we always recorded with our friend Dubh David Black.I think it was when 66 Saints was starting to break up that I first really became friends with Gary. Either then or some other time that I was feeling really sad and lost - I do for sure remember having long phone conversations with him (both on landlines - mine was 206- 726-9181) and beginning to feel the full depth of his spirit. Anyone who knows Gary knows that he is one of the most thoughtful and kind-hearted people you could ever know.It was with Gary that I first began to have real philosophical and faith based conversations about everything. Gary was (is) extremely spiritual and had the ability to talk about things in terms of "God" and the "divine" and the "inner" in a way I never had before. Gary didn't seem religious, or "god" -y, or pedantic, he made talking about these things seem like the most normal way to talk about anything. I remember when my beloved dog Lulu was at the end of life, and I felt unsure about what to do with her, when to put her to sleep. I remember Gary asking me if I had spoken to her "on the inner," a phrase I had never heard before but have thought of and used many times since, and a permission or inspiration to try to relate to Lulu, or anyone for that matter, from a different place, a true heart space.Gary was heavily influenced by Carlos Casteneda and introduced me to that work and the viewpoint and often framed his perspective from that Don Juan foundation. In fact, for my 32nd or 33rd birthday, we had a dinner down at the old Lush Life in Belltown and Gary brought me the book "The Sorcerer's Crossing" by Taisha Abelar - a Casteneda contemporary who wrote about her mystic experiences from a female perspective. I was just getting into yoga then and i remember thinking that that book was the game-changer in my yoga life, even though it wasn't a yoga book. It was a description of mysticism, sorcery, and the infinite flow of life that rocked my world and set me firmly on a path of self-discovery and knowledge that what we believe to be true is often not, that we are only ever seeing a tiny part of things. And that's how Gary sees the universe generally, down to the most practical matters and has refocused me many times in that direction - we don't know all of what is going on. I remember in particular a time when I had a very difficult interaction with an extended family member and was distraught at the outcome. Gary reminded me that often we might be ready to address something with someone, but if they are not ready, we may cause further damage. I have lived by that ever since, learning to manage my own instinct to jump in without looking to see how safe the waters are.The Dutchman was not only a practice space, it was also the home of Calleye productions, Gary's recording studio. Gary is not only a hugely talented engineer and producer, he is also one of the best musicians I know and I have been lucky enough not only to book him on Soloplexus, but to play with him in some small acts. One year we decided to do a few cover songs - I think it might have been for Soloplexus, actually. I chose Tom Waits, and Gary chose this little known band, Hayden (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jpi5gJ5AE7s).But that's Gary. He always knows the little known bands, not just because he has his ear to the radio/internet/music news, but because he has always been a champion of small acts, bands he believes in, and has the ability to make whoever is in his iso booth feel like they are a unique talent. I have had more fun and fabulous times in that recording studio than I can count, with so many of my favorite people in the world, Daniel Thornton, Jillian Cordova, Karen Hancock, Robert Lee Mitchell and with Sasha, who came down with a six pack to watch me and Dan recording our Siren record after we had been on a couple of dates. Really, I just wanted Gary and Dan, who Sasha lovingly refers to as my "two friends" after so many of my women friends moved away in what felt like a mass exodus of abandonment (thanksKat, Karen Hancock, Jillian and Kc!), I just wanted them to check out this new guy. If they liked him, that would be a good sign. I guess they did, we got married less than a year later and both Gary and Dan were in my wedding, with Gary playing our Nick Cave theme song for my walk down the aisle.In 2009, Sasha and I were in Mexico when we got a phone call from Gary. The Dutchman had burned to the ground. A devastating loss for everyone - the Dutchman was Seattle music scene fixture - but most especially for Gary. With no place to live, Gary ended up moving in with us and living with us on 12th Avenue for about a year. You really find out about a person when you live with them, and living with Gary was wonderful. It allowed our friendship to deepen further and now, maybe too bad for Gary, but I had one of my greatest confidantes and true friends living under my roof - I didn't even have to pick up the phone to connect with his goodness, he was right there!I have known Gary for almost half my life, but it seems like many lifetimes. Any time I see him, our connection is instant, as it was just recently when he called me from New York to ask if it would be a good time to come to visit us in Mexico. I myself was just coming home after two months away, but sitting at the LA airport and getting that message was about the best news ever, and picking Gary up in a nearby town, having him to talk to and go to the beach with every day, finding places and foods to explore, and just floating around in the surf, knowing I shared that same ocean of love with such a precious being, all left me feeling light and settled.Gary's influence on me has been just that - he has guided me firmly and patiently into that feeling of being settled many times, and often in the most difficult times of my life. He has showed me that living a truly dedicated spiritual life, whether through Eckankar, Yoga, mysticism, music or relationship is not only doable, but desirable and that we can make that path our own. He has given me courage to be my whole self, and perhaps more than anything, he has shown me a living example of what it means to live free, in our minds and hearts and in the day to day choices we make. Thank you Gary. I am excited for you on your next adventures, and I look forward to watching life unfold together for many more. I love you more than I could ever express. But I know you know. On the inner.